Frustration

[from April 2007]

Okay so some of you know that the other day (yesterday actually), I had to go to the Grants Pass Kiwani’s meeting because they gave me the student of the month award. So anyway, I gave my little impromptu speech on what I’m going to do in the future, and I said I’m starting college, but I don’t know what my major is going to be yet. Right? Okay…so apparently some of the old people in the club didn’t like that…they think I should know exactly what I want to do for the rest of my life…right now. And that I should go into college with a chosen major, everything.

FIRST OF ALL I AM ONLY SIXTEEN! WHO THE FUCK KNOWS WHAT THEY’RE GOING TO DO FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIFE AT THAT AGE?

Okay it’s things like that that just…grr…make me never want to join any of those damn clubs. No offense to anyone here whose family is in Kiwanis…they were really nice to me otherwise, and gave me money and stuff…it was just a few individuals who weren’t…the greatest. Anywho.

Other than that, I had a kick-ass day. The end.

Anorexia

[from Sept 2006]

I stumbled upon a Xanga (no, I don’t have a Xanga account also lol) blogring that had to do with girls who wanted to be skinner…or anorexic. I read some of the girls’ profiles, and it was pretty much horrifying. Almost like a cult. These girls called their mental addiction to losing weight “Ana” (short for anorexic I assume) and often they’d start out their blog entries with something like “Dear Ana. I was bad today. I binged so much with 500 calories, I am such a fatty.” They all knew who was anorexic on there and gave “support” for each other…commenting and saying “It’s okay that you binged today. You will do better tomorrow and Ana will forgive you.”

Rather scary.

I guess I can understand their fascination…no…NEED for losing weight. It’s like any obsession…it takes over your life…

But these girls were at healthy weights…most of them around 110 pounds before they started this obsession as far as I could tell…can’t they see that they’re not fat? Nowhere near it! I mean I’m 100 pounds and I’ll be the first to admit that that isn’t healthy, especially because I don’t exercise that much.

Do they consciously realize that they are not fat?

The part that frightens me the most is the support group these kids have for each other…not support for shedding the burden of anorexia, but support for being anorexic.

I don’t really have much more to say about this.

Oui Wii Love

Written 1-2-07

With the introduction of the new Nintendo Wii game console, an effusive uprising of puns having to do with a certain part of the male body has occurred. Gaming nerds across the nation (and even in other nations) are lovingly spewing puns right and left, with effulgent and entirely blissful looks on their faces. It’s rather, if I may say, a fun trend.

First there was one type of Wii gamer: The one who was eagerly awaiting the new system and its supreme magnificence. After awhile however, the humor of the console’s name set in and the general gamer dichotomized into

More Out-There Conspiracy Theories

Written 11-28-06

I am confident that there is a plot against all mankind. A plot arranged by a fleet of erudite hair bands, cheap ballpoint pens, and socks. In fact, I’m quite surprised that we’ve been fortuitous enough to avoid our awful fate thus far. For surely, as soon as those hair bands, ballpoint pens, and socks complete their plan, a fusillade of their numbers will come flying at us, destroying us worse than a Daphne du Maurier story.

My (faulty) reasoning behind this theory is that those three items are

The Obligatory Anti-War Rant

Written 3-14-06

I am somewhat of a cynic, especially when it comes to my views on war. I believe that wars are started mainly for the benefit of certain influential individuals, though intentions may be disguised as “what’s best for the country.” Politicians and leaders involved act disingenuous when asked to explain their reasons for pursuing war. They have ostensible explanations for many things, and one can never properly determine what is truth and what is skewed. One example is our current President, a deeply religious man, who seems to have made a covenant with God to try and take over random countries in Asia. Why he feels this need I can only

Teenage Trials

Finished 3-13-07

I have construed the reason of why teenagers never get enough sleep. Consider this: most teenagers wake up (often in a very disgruntled state) sometime between five and eight in the morning to go to school on week days, and usually arrive at school between seven and nine in the morning, depending on which school they attend. Unless, of course, they have Senioritis (those sophists who have a perfect excuse for every absence) and do not arrive until sometime in the middle of the afternoon when everyone is at lunch.

Then after a long day at school, many kids have activities or sports they must participate in for several hours, which

Telemarketers: Annoying or Just Simply There?

Finished Fall ‘06

What is the purpose of telemarketers, those scourges of the Earth? Disturbing one’s peace by abruptly calling for absolutely nothing useful whatsoever? Do they enjoy it? Do they find it exhausting? I personally think telemarketers should be hauled away by the wagonload and fed to bears.

Sometimes I will be sitting at home on a quiet afternoon,

Tanning and Teenagers

Finished 6-5-05

Thousands of teenagers go to tanning parlors all the time, simply to look “hotter” or to create the impression that they’ve spent a week in Florida. This not only applies to teenagers who are eighteen and older, but also to minors. To practice this routine is horribly dangerous, and the only positive thing about tanning is your appearance after you’ve tanned, which only lasts a short time anyhow.

Firstly, tanning itself is very risky, whether or not you get it done “naturally”

Amateur Authors

Finished 11-20-03

Five years ago, it was a rare occurrence when a child under the age of fifteen wrote and published a novel. But now, one reads almost every week of someone of that age doing that. Is it simply because adults respect younger people more, or are kids just becoming better writers?

However, most of the books I’ve read by children or teens are filled with boring, unfinished sentences, or have their idea not properly developed. And this is how a young person
does write mostly. Because they did not have the proper teaching, or not enough

Seating Arrangements–the Cons

Finished 5-4-06

Although I love my school dearly (in most cases), there’s one very minor policy held by many teachers that I would like to see changed. That is the seating arrangement that most teachers assign to each class. I personally find it inconvenient and annoying.

I was always of the opinion when I was younger that highschool students were able to choose their own seats when they walked into a class. As I entered freshman year

My Mother

Finished 4-27-06

My mom is one of my best friends. Most teenage girls shun their mothers at this age, but that’s not the case with me. Even though I have friends from school that are wonderful (although admittedly, in some cases it’s easier to deal with certain things with people my own age than with my mother), I would trade them all in an instant for my mom.

Probably the reason why I’m so close to my mom is because I’ve spent my entire life with her after all, and there’s never been any huge rift between us. I’ve never felt any

Halloween Musings

Finished Oct. ‘05

Halloween is one of the most peculiar holidays that mankind has ever dreamed up. In America at least, we dress up little kids in weird costumes and send then out to go wandering around creepy neighborhoods in the dark. And this is done willingly by most parents, which leads me to believe that yes, parents are as stupid as children think they are.

The other issue I find quite strange is that the kids get candy by

Cosmetic Surgery

Finished sometime between early ‘05 to ‘06

Millions upon millions of people have gotten cosmetic surgery since the procedure has become safer to go through with. Regardless of any potential danger, they plunge into the surgery simply because they wish to improve their looks.

One of the most popular types of surgery for women is breast surgery, most commonly breast enhancement. True to the image that many women want today, they increase their breast size, disregarding all danger, all the pain of the process, simply for

Cell Phones

Finished 1-12-05
(By the way, I now own a cellphone)

I own no cell phone, so to me, they’re useless. As I see multitudes of people every day jabbering into the mouthpiece, I become intensely jealous to the point of obsessive insanity over their obvious attachment and love towards their cell phones.

My jealousy leads me to wayward thoughts. For instance, imagine how many germs are on cell phones; people seem to enjoy practically french kissing their phones! I can only compare a person’s relationship with their cell phone to that of a man ordering a mail-order bride. Both bride and phone come from God-knows-where, pretty unwillingly, only to be forced into an unloving relationship (on their part).

In fact, this love affair between human and electrical device goes so far as to include some scary facts. Humans actually buy decorative accessories for their phone! Since when are accessories needed? A person will spend a lot of money purchasing little bits and pieces, such as colorful snap-on faceplates, exquisitely tooled leather cases, straps, replaceable buttons in various translucent colors, headphones, and special mounters for placing the phone on a table or desk. The whole situation reminds me of an owner buying their small dog different suits for each holiday, and grooming them every hour.

I believe cell phones and their accessories are just an obvious way to show off. When someone’s phone rings during class, I’m positive that the owner left the ringer on purposely, simply for the fact that everyone in the class stares at that person. Cell phones are clearly an elaborate cry for attention. I can just imagine what’s going through the owner’s head at the moment. “Oh look, my cell phone went off! Whoops! This means I have a cell phone! Oh yes, and it’s encrusted with rhinestones–err diamonds! Hint hint brag brag nudge nudge, look everyone!” The fact sickens me.

Obviously however, were I to actually own a cell phone, I would probably treat it in much the same way (though perhaps with less indulgence, seeing as I’m cheap) as the cell phone owners I have thus described. My jealously for those with cell phones contorts into a form of hatred, in which I batter the owners intensely. Until that fateful day when I actually do obtain a phone, I will remain hateful and snide towards those who already own one.

Stay

Finished 10-25-06

The other day, I watched a movie called “Stay.” It featured Ewan McGregor as a psychiatrist and Ryan Gosling as a patient. Gosling’s character was going to kill himself on the eve of his 21st birthday, and McGregor was out to stop him, for he wanted Gosling to stay viable, obviously. Throughout the movie, everyone got increasingly frantic, and McGregor tried to ingratiate himself to Gosling in order to convince him not to kill himself.

The film starts out fairly simple and gave me the feeling that

Ten (or less) completely made-up reasons not to buy the Playstation 3

Finished 11-19-06

Even though I love Playstation, I am fully prepared to boycott the new Playstation 3 game system, due to its price of 500 to 600 dollars. The price simply appalls me, because I am cheap and don’t think I should have to pay that much for anything. My conscience has finally learned to condone my habit of occasionally splurging on $50.00 games I really really want, an act I used to think would be decadent to my morals, but I still cannot fathom paying any more than $250.00 for a game system.

In my eyes, there are three types of PS3 purchasers.

L.A: Dreaded City

Finished 11-13-06

I spent my five-day weekend in that despicable city, Los Angeles. The only reason I was there was because my parents had the bright idea to FINALLY take me to Disneyland, after sixteen and one-half years of never going. Luckily my parents were nice enough to have nepotism by not taking someone who would have been a little less profusely sarcastic about the fact that they were practically almost dead and finally going to Disneyland. Honestly, I was surprised that I had the fortitude to bear with the pain of being the only person in my entire class who’d never been. My theme-park-virgin-ism was at a fractious point when my mind was finally calmed by the knowledge that I was finally going to lose that odd form of virginity.

Pre-Calculus

Finished 12-12-06

I’ve never been particularly adroit when it comes to math, but this year is especially bad. Pre-Calculus is possibly the hardest thing I have ever encountered in my entire life, and it is definitely adamant in its difficulty. Currently, I am three assignments behind in my class (which, by the way, is filled with obsequious girl jocks who have nothing better to do but flirt with the teacher, which is really gross) and even an entire hour and a half staying after school for help did not alleviate the problem. Therefore I have decided that Pre-Calculus has a voracious appetite for my soul, and that it’s out to get me.

It seems like so many people can simply take a cursory glance at a Pre-Calc problem and